Oh that makes it easy then. Saves me having to book a flight. Just get a huge ass magnet sent to your house. Your Medium drafts won't stand a chance.

Sounds like you've got Christmas sorted. Though I must ask: don't order too much of it. If you age down too drastically then it will make the majority of my dreams Seriously Illegal.

I have a couple suggestions, though I don't think you'll like them. It would require me knowing your exact whereabouts. Not sure you're ready for that.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store