Master Darrow (you’re definitely a couple notches above a mere mister. No regular male could arrange a dining room centre peace so masterfully), I am writing this to you on behalf of Miss Wilcox, who is currently doing some pretty badass crap out in the field (no literally. I live right beside a field. I’m just out there prancing about).

She wishes to express her deep-rooted gratitude for your services and offers to reward you with anything of your choosing, but preferably from something from the proceeding list:

• Scented Yankee candle (cover that synthetic smell, you know?)
• Couple packets of chocolate digestives (empty. She’s eaten them)
• The Mystery Bag
• A Sims 3 expansion pack

But anyway. Thank you for succumbing so easily to crime and murder (although I think that that, too, might be a crime?) like she did. We’ll let you know when it’s time for your matching tattoos.